September is less than two days away and the tell tale signs that fall is near are evident. It was forty-something degrees this morning and the overly chipper weather reporter informed us that light jackets would now be needed in the morning hours. On a side I note, I think it's very inappropriate that weather people are required to stay positive even though no one can possibly be happy at the news that "light jackets will be needed" or "eight to ten inches of snow are expected by morning". It's just asinine. Eyes aglow with excitement, the female weather lady on our favorite news station chirped on about the end of summer. Meanwhile an all too familiar dread begins to form a pit in my stomach as I realize that soon it will be cold, very cold and it will most likely snow, a lot. I have heard of people who actually enjoy the winter months and I commend them for their heartiness. (Take special note of my refrain from using words like "foolish" or "daft".....you're welcome). But for the rest of us, here are a few ways you can think about Fall that will surely brighten your spirits.
Try very hard not to think of words like death, dying, or dead when looking at fall leaves. Instead think of a beautiful plethora of colors, kids jumping in leaf piles and other such jovial matters. When faced with chilly weather think about wearing delicious cashmere sweaters in an assortment of warm colors. And, with the decrease in temperatures also comes a decrease in incidences of wardrobe malfunctions at Walmart. For example: portly woman dressed in a tube top, portly woman dressed in a bikini top, portly woman in a thong....you get the idea. Furthermore, Fall hosts two great holidays, Halloween and Thanksgiving. These days conjure up thoughts of hot apple cider and cinnamon, pumpkin pie, hay rides, candy corn, fire pit nights with friends, turkey, gravy, stuffing....woah baby can you feel the excitement?!
OK everyone let's practice positive thinking. Close you eyes, now think about Fall in all its glory....OK what did you come up with? Swine flu, black ice, frost bite and the like *ERRRT* Wrong answer! Do some deep breathing and try again! If you thought of hot chocolate, Snuggie blankets, warm woolen sweaters *DING DING DING* You got it right! Fantastic, you are now ready for Fall!
